Sense & Nonsense About Prayer
WHAT IT IS, WHAT IT'S NOT, HOW IT WORKS
SEVENTEEN
“They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. “Stay here and keep watch.” Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Simon,” he said to Peter, “are you asleep? Could you not keep watch for one hour? Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak.” Once more he went away and prayed the same thing. When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. They did not know what to say to him. Returning the third time, he said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Enough! The hour has come. —Mark 14:32-41
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The reason why prayer doesn’t work
for most of us is, simply, that we don’t know what we’re doing. We receive precious little instruction about prayer, about what it is and what it’s not, about our responsibility in the process, about how to apply this resource. Most Christians understand the function of God but don’t always understand the role of Jesus Christ as our Intercessor. We also have just a vague understanding of the function and role of the Holy Spirit—Who is a Person and not a “thing” or an “it,” as many of us describe Him.
Praying for God to spare Mommy’s life, only for Mommy to die a
long and painful death, often causes us to lose faith. Praying
feels useless, like we’re talking to ourselves. But we miss the
point that we are, in fact, praying wrong; that we are in a
wrong place with God and we are asking God for the wrong
things—and asking them arrogantly, at that. Then, when God
doesn’t jump through hoops we’ve eloquently laid out, we begin
to doubt His power and even His existence, not realizing that
God always answers prayer. It’s just that His answer, His acts,
are in the divine realm and operate far beyond human
understanding. Trusting in this process is called “faith,” a
choice to operate in a realm beyond what we can see and touch
and understand. But to trust in a certain knowledge that God
loves us and knows what is ultimately best for us.
One of my early favorite Christian works is a book called
Sense & Nonsense About Prayer by Lehman Strauss, Litt.D.
Pastor Strauss passed away in 1997 and his book is no longer in
print, but you can read excerpts from it here. Many of my
opinions here were formed by Dr. Strauss’s writing.
Prayer 101, in no particular order:
1. The Last Resort
How many times have I seen some TV show, some soap opera,
where the doctors give up, shaking their heads as the music
queue swells, saying, “Now, all we can is pray.” Well, you
should have prayed in the first place. Prayer is the most
powerful weapon, the finest resource, we have. Pastor Strauss
says, “Real prayer is spiritual warfare.” Every time we drop to
our knees, we are lobbing grenades over the fence, charging
forward at the enemy.
Prayer operates on faith, and if our faith was strong enough, we
could accomplish miraculous wonders through Jesus Christ. But,
like an athlete who rarely works out, like a musician who rarely
practices, prayer, for most of us, is a rusty tool. We rarely
use it, so when crisis comes, we barely even know the words. We
blather on and on and demand this and demand that and pray
really inappropriate and ineffective prayers and then get mad at
God when He doesn’t perform the way we want Him to.
I grew up in the black church which failed, in every measurable
way, to educate me properly about, well, much of anything. I
realize I’m really tough on the black church, but that’s my
calling. Somebody has to be the one ordained of God to call the
black church to account. Having spent more than a decade growing
up in the black church, I had to go to the white church—a white
summer camp to be more specific—to learn the ways of God and the
things of God. To get to know Him and to learn to hear His
voice.
2. Unrepented Sin
One of the main reasons for ineffective prayer is
unrepented sin. Sins we are aware of, sins we've committed by
accident. Sins we're not even aware we've committed or that
we've forgotten about. The Old Testament Jews had to wait for
the annual Day of Atonement to get their records cleared. We can
do this—we SHOULD do this—every day if not several times a day.
Asking God to forgive us our sins, those we know about and those
we don't know about. Those we've forgotten. Those we've omitted.
Those habits we struggle with. Those people we struggle with.
Starting your prayer with anything but a confession of sin is an utter waste of time. I'm not sure why most ministers and even pastors don't seem to understand this and do not, in my experience, model this behavior in their public prayers. Maybe it's pride, I don't know. But your best chance at an effective prayer is to make sure you yourself are not burdened by sins that offend God.
When I pray, “Lord, please forgive my sins,” is among the very first words I share with Him. And I do this in the pulpit as well. I'm not ashamed to admit I am a sinner. I try my best and my intentions are to honor God and do right. But I'm human. I fail. And those are debts I am unable to pay. The very least I can do is admit to God my faults before demanding things of Him.
As I said, this concept is rarely, if ever, modeled from a black
pulpit. This might be about arrogance or ignorance. There's not
much else between those extremes. As a result, many if not most
black churchgoers don't understand how ineffective prayer is
without repentance.
3. Prayer Has to Be Long
This is patently untrue. This is, in fact,
anti-scriptural. I’m not sure why we, in the black church, do
these endless, dull, boring invocations at the beginning of
service. This usually has the effect of pouring water on a
flame, bringing a service that may have started well to a
grinding halt while the minister gasses on and on. A prayer of
invocation is simply an invitation to the Holy Spirit to dwell
among us, in this place, at this time. It’s not a time for long,
supposedly eloquent, rambling prayers for the mothers of
children and fathers and grampas and the sheep in the meadows
and the puppies and the birds in the air and fish in the sea.
I’ve heard invocations that went on for a half hour, the
preacher just babbling on and on about Lord visit our soldiers
overseas and God look down upon the sick and shut in and those
in Africa and on Mars and so forth.
This is not what a prayer of invocation is for. And the length
of your prayer has absolutely no bearing on the effectiveness of
it. The prayer of a preacher who rolled over Sunday morning with
a woman who is not his wife has absolutely no effectiveness.
Doesn’t matter how long the man preaches or how hard he pounds
on the pulpit, he is just wasting time. Perhaps we have long
invocations because, well, we’ve always had long invocations.
It’s what we’ve been taught. The example that has been set for
us. But it’s not only wrong, it goes against the very teachings
of Christ who warns us against long, repetitious, vainglorious
public prayers [Matt 6:7]. Christ suggests, rather, that
effective prayer be done in secret. Perhaps in quiet circles of
believers not seeking attention or position within the political
structure of the church.
Rather than keep our seniors and others on their feet for twenty
minutes while you try and impress us with your eloquence, it’s
perhaps best to pray effectively rather than for a long time.
And leave the line open. Many if not most black preachers pray
this long, boring prayer that people tune out, and end with
“Amen,” closing the connection—which defeats the entire purpose
of welcoming the Spirit in. Invoke the presence of the Holy
Spirit and then leave the line open. Explain it to your folk so
they get the concept.
4. Prayer Has To Be Loud
Utterly ridiculous. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve
overhead church mothers sniffing, “Humph. That man can’t even
pray.” Or, when a pulpit prayer has been particularly stirring,
“Well, that man sure can pray!” I realize this should go without
saying, but, the volume of your prayer has nothing whatsoever to
do with the effectiveness of your prayer. Praying loud is more
about you, about your emotional state and emotional needs, about
what you need to do for you, in order for you to reach the
emotional level you need to reach.
You do not need to be a great orator. You do not need to be
particularly articulate, as our concept of such things pale in
comparison to God’s holiness. No matter how great a show you put
on, it is, at best, a pitiful Little Rascals sideshow that Jesus
Christ needs to interpret for us. We cannot talk to God except
that we speak to Jesus [John 14:6]. Our prayers are to Him and
through Him. If the Father pays us any attention at all, it is
for Jesus’ sake—not for any theatrical effort on our part.
As a teenager, I remember having shut ins (what you country folk
call “lock-ins”) and praying all night. On one occasion, this
sister comes over to me while I’m praying and starts screaming
in my ear. PRAISE HIM! PRAISE HIM! THANYA THANKYA THANKYA
THANKYA THANKYA! HAH, GLORY!
I looked over at her and said, “Thank you, sister, but please
stop shouting in my ear.” She said she was only trying to keep
me from falling asleep. I told her I wasn’t sleeping—I was
praying. Quietly. To myself. She said I shouldn’t expect a
breakthrough like that and all but accused me of lying. I
couldn’t possibly be praying since I wasn’t screaming at the top
of my lungs.
Black Church Folk are loud. We like to be loud. But good
teaching needs to go forth as well: volume doesn’t impress God.
Our lives, our hearts and our motives impress God. God isn’t
hard of hearing. All that blaring music and screaming—that’s
about us. That’s about our emotional needs, about our culture
and our traditions. Being loud is not a sin, Lord knows I like
(and frankly need) to cry out to Him on occasion. But I
understand that’s more about me than Him. He can hear me just
fine.
5. Prayer Has To Be In The King James
Utter nonsense. Our black preachers struggling through
all of these “these” and “thous,” butchering the poetry of 17th
century English—a syntax that requires quite a bit of erudition
to reproduce on the fly. Meanwhile, in most white churches the
pastor talks to God like He’s his buddy. Like He’s Fred. “Well,
Fred, we just love you. Fred we just wanna thank you so much for
what You’ve done and what You’re doing, Fred.”
And, you know what? They’re right. Not that God is Fred, but
that God is our Friend. He wants to be our friend, He wants to
be known to us. Not some obscure, abstract concept. A God Up
There Somewhere. That’s nonsense. That’s a song we should never,
ever sing again because it is simply not scriptural.
The Bible teaches us that God dwells within us [John 14:17]. He
is not unknowable. He is not ‘up there.” He’s right here. In
you. In me. We can’t fool Him by putting on a fake accent or
talking in the King James. We can’t hide from His presence by
putting on our Prayer Voice. We should speak to Him
respectfully, sure. But we can use our own words and our own
voice.
Pretending to be someone you are not completely undermines the
effectiveness of your prayer. God knows you. He understand what
you’re saying. God invented language. You can’t trick Him. And
the eloquence of your prayer has absolutely no bearing on the
effectiveness of your prayer.
6. God Always Answers
Jeremiah 7:13-16: And now, because ye have done all these
works, saith the LORD, and I spake unto you, rising up early and
speaking, but ye heard not; and I called you, but ye answered
not; Therefore will I do unto this house, which is called by my
name, wherein ye trust, and unto the place which I gave to you
and to your fathers, as I have done to Shiloh. And I will cast
you out of my sight, as I have cast out all your brethren, even
the whole seed of Ephraim. Therefore pray not thou for this
people, neither lift up cry nor prayer for them, neither make
intercession to me: for I will not hear thee.
Growing up Pentecostal, I was taught God doesn’t hear the
prayers of sinners. Which is right and wrong. God hears
everything. That’s what “God” means. Saying there’s something
God can’t do limits His omnipotence and confines Him to our
human understanding.
What the Bible means when it suggests God doesn’t hear the
prayers of sinners is that God doesn’t act on their behalf. This
is because the proper way to pray to God is beyond our power or
comprehension. As mortal beings, there is absolutely nothing we,
in and of ourselves, can do to please God or to know God. This
is why Jesus Christ came to us, why He died for us and what He
meant when He said that no one can approach or know God unless
they come through Christ.
Jesus Christ is our intercessor [Romans 8:34]. Which means he
untangles our language, our arrogance. Talking to God is, in and
of itself, pure arrogance, the creation demanding things of the
creator. Jesus runs interference for us, correcting our grammar,
discerning our true intent and knowing our heart. He acts like a
spiritual translator, making sense out of our pitiful rhetoric
and lobbying God on our behalf.
People who do not know Christ, who have rejected Christ—what we
call “sinners,” which, again, is a misnomer since we are all
sinners [Romans 3:23]—do not have access to Christ as an
intercessor and, therefore, God, presumably, doesn’t act on
their behalf.
But, make no mistake, God hears everything. That’s what “God”
means.
7. Yes, No, Wait
God always answers prayer. It’s just that the answers are
not always what we want or expect them to be. But the answers
are always what we need them to be. See, God doesn’t promise us
we’ll always get what we want. He promises to meet our needs.
Strauss suggests there are three basic answers (but God is, of
course, not limited solely to these three): Yes, No and Wait.
Our task is to pray for the wisdom to know His voice when He is
speaking and to know what His answer is.
8. Make It Effective
Don’t compartmentalize. Don’t cordon off certain areas of
your life for God and certain for things you think God can’t
handle or activities you don’t want God to be involved in.
That’s spiritual schizophrenia, you becoming a spiritual Sybil,
a multi-personality disorder where you’re singing praises to God
and cussing out your neighbor with the same mouth [James 3:10].
Where you’re working hard at your church and performing lewd sex
acts with someone you’re not married to at night.
Your behavior, your walk with God, has a direct impact on the
power and effectiveness of your prayers [James 5:16]. I am
regularly and absolutely astonished at the folks I meet who call
themselves “saved” but who behave just like those we call
“sinners.” “Saved” but running to the club. “Saved” but headed
for the liquor store. “Saved” but hooking up at the motel. I’m
astonished.
God hears all prayers. But God responds to the prayers of those
who love Him. Those who keep His commandments. The effectual
fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
9. Make It Plain
Growing up in the orthodox Pentecostal church (by which I
mean we were absolutely convinced we were the only ones going to
heaven. I mean, COGIC was going to hell, Baptists were going to
hell), I was taught that the only evidence of your salvation was
your ability to speak in tongues. Now, mind you, most of those
lovely people I grew up with had no idea what tongues were or
what speaking in tongues was evidence of. It was all or nothing:
speak in tongues or you’re going to hell.
Most of them referrer to tongues as, “The heavenly language.”
Which is patently untrue. Tongues has nothing to do with heaven.
Tongues are, simply, other languages. An unknown tongue is
simply a langue not known to us. It has nothing to do with
heaven, for the things of heaven are yet to be revealed to us.
The Bible teaches us that eye has not seen nor ear heard the
wonderful things God has planned for us [I Cor 2:9]. To suggest
you can, somehow, tap into this stuff contravenes scripture.
When people are speaking in tongues, truly speaking in tongues,
it is, likely, an ancient language and, perhaps, a known one
like Aramaic. The Bible requires that there also be someone with
the gift of interpreting tongues [I Cor 14:6-14], that’s not all
Bubble Bubble Boil and Trouble babba babble going on. God is not
the author of confusion [I Cor 14:33], so when you hear all
these folks going in, presumably speaking in tongues, my
personal guess is perhaps 1 in 1,000 is actually speaking in
tongues. The rest are either rehearsing or repeating something
the Spirit gave them a long, long time ago, or they’re just
faking it.
None of which has any impact, any whatsoever, on prayer.
Praying in tongues does NOT mean your prayer is more effective
than my English prayer. The effectiveness of prayer is not
measured by the eloquence of my speech or even the language I
speak in. The effectiveness of prayer is measured by the quality
of your walk with Jesus Christ.
Unless you’re planning to be a missionary to some remote and
obscure land, tongues is one of the least effective gifts of the
Spirit. Tongues edifies you more than it edifies God who can,
after all, understand not only our language but our motives.
Speaking in tongues is a neat parlor trick, and some wear it
like a badge of honor— I speak in tongues therefore I am better
or holier than you—but, truth is, there’s a laundry list of
spiritual gifts that are more useful to God [I Cor 13:1-3]. I’ve
been baptized in the Holy Spirit. I have spoken in tongues. I do
not speak in tongues with any regularity, but I do under the
anointing of God. But it was not a gift I actively sought. Once
I learned more about God, more about the Bible, I prayed to God
not for tongues but for wisdom [Proverbs 4:1-13]. I told God, at
age 15, “Lord, if I could choose my spiritual gift, I’d rather
have wisdom than tongues.” I said those very words, literally,
to God.
I don’t claim to be wise. I make a lot of mistakes. But I value
learning. I value instruction and teaching. I love logic and
wisdom. I love to sit and listen to elders, old men who love to
be Dad, who love to teach. I am available to God, learning as I
go. I do not claim the gift of wisdom, as I claim no gifts.
Spiritual gifts are from God. They are for His purpose and for
His season. They are, in many ways, like shoes you rent from a
bowling alley. They don’t belong to you. You just wear them for
a little while. You don’t brag about bowling shoes you rented
from the counter. This is, principally, why I greatly disapprove
of people running around calling themselves “Prophet” this or
‘Prophetess” that. No prophet in scripture ever called himself a
prophet—other people called him “prophet” because those gifts
were in effect.
I don’t claim the gift of wisdom, I just work within that gift
and let others make up their own minds about who or what I am.
The Bible teaches us our gifts will make room for us [Proverbs
18:16], which is to say, rather than run around calling yourself
Prophet So And So, just prophecy. Just work. Just do the things
that God has ordained in your life. Let other people decide what
to call you or what hat you should wear and all of that.
10. He Heard You The First Time
I’ve heard many Christians brag about how long they’ve
been praying and how hard they’ve been praying, begging, rolling
on the floor, slobbering, beseeching God for whatever it is
they’re praying about.
Well, that very nice.
God heard you the first time. God doesn’t need all of that snot
and slobber. All that yelling. All that tearing of clothes and
knocking stuff off of table and all that drama. That’s not for
God, that’s for you. That may be what you need to do, what your
process needs to be, in order to get you to a place where your
flesh, your humanity is humbled enough for your prayer to be
effective. I’m not suggesting there’s anything wrong with these
prayer-a-thons, but I am suggesting that God doesn’t need it.
Maybe you do, maybe we need to certainly get our humanity, our
flesh, under submission. But never think it takes 36 hours of
hollering to get God’s attention. He heard you the first time.
11. The Beginning of Wisdom
The Bible says that the fear of God is the beginning of
wisdom [Psalm 111:10]. By “fear,” what the word means is “Holy
reverence for who God is and for what He can do.” The problem
with so many Christians these days is we simply no longer fear
God. Which is odd, considering the terrible evidence of global
warming, the great climactic disasters we’ve suffered and
continue to suffer, and the terrible political turmoil going on
in the world. In these desperate economic times, these times of
war and famine and disease, so many “Christians” still continue
to tempt God by living lives that are not markedly different
from the way so-called “sinners” live. Sexual immorality is,
likely, chief among our sins, but our biggest sin is likely
intolerance of one another. Running our big mouths constantly,
tearing one another down with gossip. Stabbing one another in
the back just so we can feel better about ourselves.
All of this undermines the effectiveness of our prayers. And
there’s absolutely no sense getting mad at God when He doesn’t
perform the way we want Him to.
12. Let God Do His Job
Perhaps the biggest mistake we make in our prayer life is
we want to tell God not only what we want or what we need but in
what manner He should act. We say, “Lord, please talk to my boss
and make him give me a raise.” This limits God’s options. We’re
tying God’s hands because we’ve so narrowed down the course of
action that His response is often, “no.” For if He did,
specifically, what we asked him to do, chances are that would
harm us in some way, somewhere down the road. The worst thing
God can imagine is us becoming separated from Him. His only
motive in denying our request is preventing that separation from
occurring. He desires for us to dwell with Him, abide in Him.
And He knows, if we get our way, many of us simply wouldn’t be
able to handle the very life change we’re asking for. It would
corrupt us and cripple our relationship with God.
Don’t direct God. Don’t tie Him up in knots. The proper way to
pray is not to pray for a specific action but pray for a need.
Rather than pray that God would change your boss’ mind, pray
that God would meet your household’s needs. A more appropriate
prayer is, “Lord, we need help managing our finances. Please
open doors and please give us the wisdom to see those doors
opened and the courage to step through them.” This gives God a
lot more options to provide creative solutions to your problems,
solutions that may have absolutely nothing to do with your boss.
Many of us are impatient. We help God out by taking matters into
our own hands instead of being patient and trusting Him. We pray
for the solution but we fail to pray for the wisdom to actually
see and know the solution when it’s right in front of us.
Most of our prayers fail because we pray for the wrong things.
And, not only that, but we dictate to God the manner in which He
should accomplish those things.
13. Keep The Line Open
At this camp I was taught to pray when I got up in the
morning. To pray about what to wear. Which socks. Lord, which
tie should I put on? To pray while I’m brushing my teeth. To
pray while walking across the field to the chapel. I was taught
to keep the line open. Too many of us close prayers with “Amen,”
a practice we should stop doing because, in our mindset, “Amen”
ends the prayer. Which is not true. “Amen” simply means
“certainly” or “so let it be.” It does not mean, “Our connection
to God is hereby closed.”
We should start prayer when our eyes open. “What would You have
me to do today, God?” And leave off the “Amen.” Just leave the
connection open. All day. Every day. Don’t worry about tying up
the line—He’s never too busy for you.
Praying over what dress to wear or what jacket to put on may
seem trifling and stupid. There are no trifling or stupid
matters to your Holy Father. And if you’d invite Him into even
these choices and decisions, you will begin to walk in the
Spirit [Galatians 5:16]. You’ll begin to invoke the presence of
the Holy Spirit in every move you make. And that will not only
greatly improve your walk with God, but it will exponentially
improve the effectiveness of your prayers.
By keeping the connection open, there’ll be music you won’t
listen to. If God’s in the car with you, you won’t be listening
to music that requires “Explicit Content” warnings. You’ll be
less likely to grieve the Holy Spirit by watching moronic idiocy
like “Flava of Love” and other idiot shows designed to showcase
how stupid black people are. If your Holy Father is in the room
with you, you’re much less likely to take that man or that woman
you’re not married to to bed.
14. Give God Time
One of the reasons our prayers are ineffective si we say
what we came to say and get up, going about our day. we're too
much in a hurry, too distracted by the concerns of the day. When
we pray, we need to stop talking and listen—really listen—to
what God is saying. Give Him time to speak to us, to inspire us
and lead us to the answers we are seeking
15. Already Answered
Finally, the most tragic product of a poor prayer life is
our spiritual blinders. God has, quite often, already answered
our prayer and we don’t even know it. We’re busy looking for the
burning bush or the sign in the sky. But that’s not how God
moves. God moves as often through motivation as through
demonstration. He simply brings things to pass that He is
motivated to bring to pass. And the answers we are seeking are,
more often than not, already here. We’re just walking past and
ignoring them because we’re not spiritually in tune with God.
We're expecting God to move in a way we ourselves have outlined
for Him.
The worst thing a detective can have is an opinion. Having an
opinion about who done it blinds the detective to the evidence
before him. At the outset, it may lo kike it was Professor Plumb
in the study with an ice pick. But a good detective leaves his
opinion of such matters at home and follows the evidence to,
perhaps, the maid in the kitchen with a screwdriver.
When we bring our opinion, our vision, of how God should move
and when God should move, we set up expectations that are likely
to be disappointed. It blinds us to seeing how God has already
moved. How He has already worked things out in our favor. We
can’t see it because we’ve brought our process, our opinion,
into the matter. When we should approach the things of God with
an open mind, praying not only for our needs to be met but for
the wisdom to know that they have and the patience to wait.
Christopher J. Priest
4 June 2006
editor@praisenet.org
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